I want a platinum blonde life

so I can bleach another color.

For some reason I like that lyric from No Doubt. It was an awesome song to rock out to while I was biking my way to track practice my 8th grade year. I miss that, about the only thing I do miss.

I talk a lot about who terrible middle school was for me, and it was. Yet, when I was there it sometimes didn't seem so bad. Those were the moments that kept me hanging on.

I think there are two types of bad situations. The first is the one you don't realize is bad. Enter Alex Bauer. I dated him four times for a total of 5 months or so. I did like him at one time and did enjoy his company, but any time something went wrong I made an excuse, blamed myself, or blamed someone else. When in reality it was his doing. I thought that I loved him and that we had a healthy relationship . . . wrong. He's probably one of the worst relationships I have ever had and, hopefully, ever will. Luckily, I'm over it . . . that doesn't mean I'm OK with what went on between us, but I do think that I'm exhibiting a little bit more maturity than he has.

The second type are the points in time where you think things are horrible, but later you can see that they weren't that bad. I would say that had to be the first semester of junior year. Things were pretty crazy. I had a new guy I liked who was more than a handful, I had 8 classes a day, I doubt I was sleeping too well, and I was in a ridiculous Psychology class that made me feel crazy. I had a nice little bout of depression and had two or three melt downs. Now as I look back on it, I realize that it wasn't that bad and if I had just pulled my head out of my butt and took a little more care of myself things could have easily remedied.